Learning to say “No”

As a kid, I was deeply affected by the story of Cinderella and if someone in the family asked who your favorite is, I’d proudly declare her name. I wanted to wear apparel like Cinderella and wished to have fairy for a friend. When someone asked why I enjoy her so much, I’d say because she’s beautiful, honest and kind. She always helps others and does great things to even people who are bad.

We grow up watching films or household examples where seniors talk in front of us that those who say no are poor. Frequently “kindness” is correlated with saying “yes” but the truth is these are two distinct things. In the words of Dr. Newman, “Girls are increased to be care givers and nurturers, and which is why the issue is much more prevalent for women than men”, however in my opinion the issue isn’t gender specific and it is both in women and men.

For Love- it’s proven fact that human beings are emotional and all of us want love and affection. This is one of the most crucial reasons that lead some people to say yes because we believe saying No will draw people besides us and we won’t be loved just as much.

The notion of rejection is painful and sometimes just from uncertainty, a number people say yes despite the fact that we would like to say no in our heart.

Tree Trunk Tree Just Say No Etched EngraveFor showing kindness- All of us have seen this in the films that great folks are always giving and kind, and bad men and women are always unkind.They always say no to everybody. Saying No is frequently related to rudeness and hence we choose to be kind rather than being impolite.

As humans, we feel danger in the unknown locations and for that reason keep giving ourselves false explanations; to remain in those erroneous jobs and with wrong people and keep saying yes to the things that make us miserable.

Hence, a number of us as adults, find it hard to say no to elderly people and to the supervisors at work place.

The cycle which starts in our youth keeps going and we’re trapped to the extent that we begin feeling guilty whenever we say no to people. In the majority of the cases it is just an over hyped situation that we construct in our minds. In a few other instances however, things get weird following Bee Removal people, that are habitual of listening from us suddenly begin getting no. They start feeling that we’ve turned arrogant and some even feel helpless. The same thing occurs in the office where our coworkers and supervisors do not expect us to say no.

It offers you the chance to be true to your self- Saying No to matters that makes you miserable saves your energy and time for doing other productive stuffs. It gives you the opportunity to become really involved in the things which you truly enjoy doing.

Great for mental health- There is nothing worse than saying yes for something you do not wish to do. In my personal experience, it attracts plenty of frustration and unnecessary strain. Saying No without feeling guilty can help you feel relaxed and you can do your regular with greater attention and positive energy.

It enables you to understand who your true well wishers are People who stick to you for getting favor of any sort won’t remain with you once they learn that you’re capable of saying No to them. Consequently, it’s also a fantastic technique to know who all of your real wishers are.

Saying No is quite tricky for men and women that are in the habit of saying yes. Some suggestions derived from my personal experiences to handle this issue-

Letting go off the youth preaching and saying no with confidence does not makes you a bad man.

Take time before you say yes- Every time somebody asks you to do something, do not say yes immediately, rather take some time (a day or two), and think whether you actually need to do it. After considering, politely accept or deny the petition.

Bear in mind that your self-worth does not depend on what others think of you- Your self-worth is exactly what you recognize and it shouldn’t be subject to opinion of others. You do not have to please everybody you know. Understand that you’re better than that and certainly worth more.

It’s a fantastic thing to be considerate, generous and helping. Someone can be kind and in the same time set his/her boundaries. It’s quite easy to say yes”.

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